I am learning my own language. The sounds and subtext of my bodywhen the vowels make long, drawnout sounds, and when they stop suddenly. Blunt and obvious. I haven't spoken this language of mein a long time, and I am stumbling through every awkward sentence. Did you hear me?Do you understand me?Is all of myself... Continue Reading →
I am a highway they've tried to change. Because I am something not everyone knows how to love. I triumph like a girl; an overwhelmingly dangerous animal is a part of me. Teeth baring and protective of my meal. Here I am. Alive more than some. When I write words on paper. When I see... Continue Reading →
It's not plot. It's what comes in night terrors and dreamy dripping fantasies that take over the afternoon. Things that don't make sense, finding their way inside chest cavities, through open-ended questions, burning paper with every single thing that needs to be forgotten. Or repaired. Or rebuilt. Lyrics I forgot I knew until the song... Continue Reading →
To bud life at the root, you must cut off the dead. Slice through the heart of what is no longer growing. Trap the energy in the fingerlings that reach up and out to portals that are waiting for new, green sprouts. Blooms buried so deep the only way to coax them out is a... Continue Reading →
Last night, I walked in the rain for the first time in decades. Let the cold water soak my clothes until my skin glistened like a waterfall. Eyes wide; skin shedding. No running, no rushing. Born from the uncomfortable. I am at stand still on a long road in the blue... Continue Reading →
A lesson learned the hard way growing up in the pews of buildings that spiral to heaven, you memorize the muted colors of hymnals and padded folding chairs. the small hairs in your ears, back of arms, knowing by heart every phrase separating you from anything other. all the colorful. all the raw. the... Continue Reading →
It's just under my pink paper skin.The deep, dark sadness that comes from a year of waiting. Holding. Staying. Everything a wash of blurred grey;the clearness of lines, gone. Facessunken from lack of color, eyes downcast, limbs treading water like dogs nearly swept under a current of chaos. I am small. Sinking into myself morewith... Continue Reading →
A name in me, common and silent.The slender blue frame of it spokenin the cold white air, provides a brief breath; a ventilation. My mouth is red hot.Polite as a cotton ball that’s yet to soak the blood at the back of my throat. A garden of buried seeds. Still. Waiting for the cold moon to phase into song and... Continue Reading →
I can’t write it. The lockdown of life. But, that seems unimportant compared to the taking. Knees on necks. Shotguns to abdomens. Teargas and crispen orange blazes-- a clear quarantine that’s been lived in your street and communities and homes and where you work and nextdoor. Now, months into house arrest: Headaches. Tremors. Anxiety. Liplocked... Continue Reading →
The rusty blood crust that waits in the corners. It’s always been there. Now with a sidecar of brave. You're hunted on the street like an animal the same animal you came from. Different skin. There was hope once. Now it’s a never-ending shuffle of kaleidoscope pandemic fueled disaster plans and hand... Continue Reading →
I can’t quantify a year. Or ten. I can’t look back and say ...this moment was best. Because every second that my feet find their way to the cold hardwood floor each morning is a second I want to breathe in, like molecules full of energy bursting the moment they hit my lungs with the... Continue Reading →
The purple bowl with the dopey-eyed lama flies through the air, landing face-down on the hardwood, oatmeal exploding from all sides like an eruption of sticky silt landing heavy in a circumference of at least twelve feet from the epicenter. The unmistakable sound shatters the tantrum from the kitchen table and paralyzes me in the... Continue Reading →
In The Way 